


daily horoscope

by cjtobycaptain



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Campaign Era Fic, F/M, Gen, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:02:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28972524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjtobycaptain/pseuds/cjtobycaptain
Summary: Donna has decided to take up astrology as her newest campaign hobby. It's well received by some, but definitely not all.
Relationships: Josh Lyman/Donna Moss
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	daily horoscope

Almost every week, Bartlet Headquarters eagerly anticipated what Donna’s new “thing” would be. Last week, her thing was butterfly hair clips. They were cute, albeit unprofessional, and she had a different hairstyle with them each day. Everyone assumed she’d keep this trend, especially after raving to anyone that would listen about how they were  _ so _ versatile and you could do a thousand hairstyles with them. 

On Monday morning, Donna arrived at HQ butterfly clip-less, and with a newspaper tucked under her arm. “Did your butterfly friends fly away on your way here?” Josh asks, nodding to her plain ponytail. 

Donna rolls her eyes and sets her things down at her desk before replying. “No. The interns told me you said they were unprofessional.” She says, lips pursed in a tight frown. 

“Donna, they're for kids.” Josh says, hoping she’ll just drop the subject entirely and never bring another quirky trend into the office. 

“Well Maragret liked them.” She says, taking a seat in her chair and opening the newspaper to the horoscope section. 

Josh watches her eyes scan the page, wondering what she could possibly be reading  _ that _ intently. He clears his throat, mostly waiting for her to tell him if he has any messages from the weekend or updates on the projects Sam and Toby were working on. After a few minutes, he clears his throat again and waits impatiently for his assistant to peer over the top of the newspaper at him. “Oh no don’t let me interrupt you.” He grumbles, eyes scanning the room for the coffee he had been promised earlier. 

“Josh are you a Scorpio?” Donna asks, taking a pencil to the newspaper and circling something, then underlining something else. 

“A what?” He’s annoyed now, the next round of Democratic debates were rapidly approaching and Governor Bartlet was tanking in the polls. 

“You are. Anyway, it says that you need to relax. Listen, ‘You can't spend all your time running from one activity to the next, Scorpio. You need to take a break from time to time. You have all the energy you need, but you should think about relaxing yourself as a whole.’” She says, looking at him with brows furrowed. 

“Please don’t tell me you’re an astrologer now.” Josh groans, walking away to track down his coffee.

Donna immediately gets up to follow him, holding the newspaper. “Josh, listen this stuff’s real! Here’s mine: ‘Libra, life around you today almost seems like a bad dream. It's almost as if people are talking, but nothing intelligible is coming out of their mouths. Perhaps two people close to you are having problems getting along.’ And it’s totally accurate because Toby and Sam have been at each other’s throats all  _ week _ about the debate and-”

“You have 10 seconds to put the newspaper away and never bring this up again, got it?” Josh snaps and speeds away, muttering about how astrology is bullshit. 

Donna returns to her desk, but is not defeated. Sam pokes his head around the corner to make sure Toby is nowhere to be seen. “Good morning Donna.” He says with a grin as he passes her desk. 

He glances down, seeing the newspaper open. Immediately, Sam’s eyes light up and he points to the horoscope section, “What’s in store for Gemini today?” 

Donna beams from ear to ear. “Ooh Gemini, I should’ve guessed. Okay it says: ‘Gemini, you may have been a little difficult to be around lately. You like to treat yourself to a little moodiness from time to time, but the people around you might appreciate a little cooperation. You need to have some important conversations with the people you care about, so it’s best to stop brooding.’ Oh that’s funny, cause you and Toby are fighting so much.”

“Well I guess the stars never lie. Thank you Miss. Moss, off to deal with the beast himself.” Sam waves his goodbye which Donna returns, feeling elated. 

After lunch, Donna catches Josh dozing off in his office. She knocks on the door, startling him. “Taking your horoscope seriously Scorpio?” She asks, rocking back and forth on her heels. 

“No. It's not real so I won’t be listening to it. What do you need?” Josh rubs his temples and forces his vision to focus again.

It was sort of a lie that he hadn’t been thinking about what Donna said this morning. He could use some serious relaxation, but it was impossible. Josh could feel himself burning out but couldn’t do a thing about it. It had to be a coincidence, there’s no way it was written in the stars that he desperately needed a break. Right?

“I need you to ask Toby when his birthday is. Also you have a call from James Lewis’ office. But I think the Toby thing is more important.” She smiles and lingers in the doorway, waiting for him to reply.

“Donna I don’t know Toby’s birthday.” He replies, fighting the urge to roll his eyes and kick her out of his office. 

“You absolutely do! Now tell me.” She crosses her arms, furrows her brow, and tries her hardest to pull off a mean face. 

“God, I miss the stupid butterfly clips,” Josh says, opening his planner to the section where he has everyone’s birthday written down “August 28th. Why?” 

“Oh, he’s a Virgo! That’s why him and Sam fight so much you know. They’re not compatible.” She explains, unfolding the newspaper once again and scanning the page for Virgo’s horoscope. 

“Yup, it says so right here. ‘Virgo, your desire to perform, work, and excel is strong today, and creative energy is abundant. Problem-solving comes more easily and naturally, and you're able to pull back from a situation just enough to get a good overview of it.’ That settles it then! Him and Sam will make up later on and things will be fine again.” Donna is quite pleased with the outcome of her conversation, and returns to her desk outside of Josh’s office. 

Annoyed, he notes that she’s left the door wide open. As he crosses the room to close it, he catches Sam sulking by. “Oh! I was just looking for you…” Sam says, sounding scared. 

“Toby?” Josh asks, cocking a brow.

“Does everyone know?” Sam asks, if dogs who had their tail tucked between their legs could talk they would certainly sound like Sam right now. 

“Almost everyone.” Josh says with a chuckle. In reality, everyone knew. It was hard to miss their screaming match on Friday night, and even harder to ignore the tension this morning. The only people who may have been unaware of the situation were Leo and Jed, but seeing as they had enough going on as it was, that was probably for the best. 

Josh and Sam talked for the better part of an hour, and Sam at least claimed to have felt better about things. He was ready to leave so Josh could return the call to Lewis’ office before it was too late when he said “Huh. Donna told me earlier that I’d need to have important conversations with people today.” He shrugs and reaches for the door, and is promptly wacked over the head with a pen. 

“That’s all fake!” Josh shouts after Sam as he closes the door behind him. 

“You have done an excellent job striking a nerve, Miss. Donatella.” Sam says chuckling as he walks by her desk.

“That’s what I’m here for. Listen, I really think you should talk to Toby. His horoscope and yours are totally saying it.” Donna says, her signature doe eyes in full force. 

“Yeah, you’re right. And the stars don’t lie too, I suppose.” Sam replies with a serious nod. 

The Gemini takes a deep breath, nods, and marches down the hall to Toby’s office. Everyone lived to tell the story of their second argument, then make up for both, so it was a successful day. 

To celebrate the small victory and dissolving tension, Josh suggests everyone order Chinese, have a few drinks, and stay late to wrap up some minor things for the upcoming week. Everyone agreed, especially considering how little they had actually managed to accomplish due to Sam and Toby. Josh, Donna, Sam, Toby, and the other staff sat around a card table in the center of Bartlet HQ chatting about how their weekends had been. The room went quiet when Josh started getting loud, as he was prone to do after two beers, and started questioning Toby about what had happened today.

“So you two just argued again and you were done? That doesn’t make any sense.” He said, starting quizzically at Toby.

“Well during lunch Donna told me I would be utilizing my problem solving skills a lot today. Because I’m a Virgo.” Toby replies, straight faced and monotone. 

Donna practically dissolves into a heap of giggles while Josh’s face turns red with rage or embarrassment. He rises from his folding chair without a word and heads outside. A gentle snow is falling over the parking lot, and everyone crowds around a window to watch Josh take a deep breath, scream fuck at the top of his lunges, and come back inside.


End file.
